“I Have Conflicts That Occur Within My Team and I Know I Could Manage Those Relationships Better…” (Roadblock #7)
Conflict is endemic in most executive teams and boards though it often goes unacknowledged because it tends to be seen as a sign of failure by its members and other stakeholders instead of a natural and to-be-expected phenomenon given the diversity of interests, competing priorities, organisational tensions, and conflicting demands that they are required to deal with.
Executive teams are increasingly becoming the testing ground for values and developments that are emergent and contentious in the organisation and perhaps even in society itself.
Executive teams usually comprise individuals who have become members because they are heads of function and often see themselves as representing their own area of responsibility. This identification with the team they already feel bonded to, and which underpins their success, is frequently a major barrier to bonding and identification with the executive team and its mission.
In seeing themselves as belonging to, and representative of their team of origin, the executive team is treated as the place they go to promote the interests of their functions, compete for resources, account for and defend their area and protect its prospects. This kind of mentality – often subconscious but not always – leads to a theatre of conflict in which members are set against one another rather than being a cohesive team that adds the greatest value to the organisation’s mission and goals.
The effectiveness of the executive team depends on the diversity and balance of the expertise, and personality types and this very diversity is also what naturally generates contention and conflicts.
Most conflict situations are emotionally charged because they concern issues that are important to members – whether needs, values, beliefs, fears, identity, or ideas. The team’s emotional reactions are usually complex and multiple and members may feel too vulnerable to acknowledge, or even be conscious of, the range and complexity of their emotional responses (which may themselves be conflicting within any given member).
Managing and addressing emotional responses in your team is generally something you’ve never been taught. You are in this executive position because you are good at what you do, not necessarily because you know how to tackle and resolve emotional issues within your team. In an ideal situation, everybody in the team would think and act rationally and everything would work out fine. In reality, well… it’s quite different, as you know, and it rarely operates the way we anticipate it.
While you may have developed strategies to manage your own emotions, you may still feel like you’re not doing a great job at helping your team members manage theirs. Maybe it’s because you don’t care; but honestly, we don’t think so. Maybe you’re afraid of going ‘there’ and being ridiculed if you can’t improve the situation. Maybe you don’t know specifically how you can help and address the issue. Or maybe that scares you and you’d rather not think about it. Whatever your reason, it’s not up to us to judge, but rather to provide you with some useful pointers to tackle the situation.
We mentioned in Roadblock #1 the importance of having crystal clarity of your core values and core drivers. This also applies to your team members, because everyone within a team has their own unique core values and core drivers and those are what underpin every action and decision they make, their emotional response and how they respond to incentives.
Understanding what drives human decisions and behaviour is the first and necessary step towards managing and resolving conflicts in your teams.
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