Emotional Strength – Truth & Myths
Contrary to what most people think, emotional strength is not about trying to avoid feeling emotions, or bottling them up inside, or suppressing emotions when they arise.
There is a common misunderstanding that when someone is able to suppress his/her emotions, this person is considered “strong”.
Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor said in his meditations “The nearer a man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength.”
Depending on how you deal with emotions, you will find yourself in two different modes of functioning:
- Survival mode: This is where your emotions take control over you, where you experience the emotional rollercoaster – from highs to lows – repetitively. In other words, you are highly volatile and the smallest thing can generally set you off… Often the consequences of finding yourself controlled by your emotions lead to a feeling of being scattered. It’s also very tiring because it drains your energy; it’s stressful for yourself and those around you, and it usually leads you to make foolish decisions and lose control.
- Growth mode: This is when you are able to manage your emotions effectively and keep a calm mind. Emotional strength is the ability to maintain a hold of oneself by balancing emotions (positives and negatives) and reducing their amplitudes and swings.
When you balance your positive and negative emotions by asking yourself when you are on a high (What could be some drawbacks or disadvantages) or by asking when you are on a low (What could be some benefits or advantages), you actively bring your mind back to equanimity. You become steady, calm, more focused, and present.
As a consequence, you feel more energised, enthusiastic, in control and you are able to make better decisions.
Next time you are going through an intense emotional response, whether due to positive or negative emotions, instead of suppressing your emotions to appear “cool”; act cool and calm your mind by bringing the two sides together in your awareness.
In Nutshell:
No matter what happens in life, we will experience emotions because that’s part of being human. Trying to avoid what is unavoidable (feeling emotions) is the source of human suffering. However, rather than trying to push them out of the way of bottling them up, do your best to balance your emotions and calm your mind.
To do that, TAKE NO CREDIT, TAKE NO BLAME STAY FOCUSED ON YOUR MISSION.
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